im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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