Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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