I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize