Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
