I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
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