If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Randomize