Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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