She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Randomize
