the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
