dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
You made out with two different species that night
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Randomize
