You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
