how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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