Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
