My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
