anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I just had sex on a roof
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
