we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
