She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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