This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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