I swear she didn't look like that last week.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize