just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I feel great
I just peed on a car
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
