ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I can't put those talents on a resume
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
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