margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize