we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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