doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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