his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
In other news, I just burned my penis
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I just forgot I was standing up.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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