I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
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i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
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