i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
