The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Randomize
