Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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