Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
