Texts From Last Night

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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.

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  (201): you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful. http://tfl.nu/ngce
  Replies (10) Good night (10286) Bad night (753)
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  (941): View more from Florida

  She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???

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  (941): She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina??? http://tfl.nu/hnyt
  Replies (24) Good night (1302) Bad night (8138)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us

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  (610): Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us http://tfl.nu/1uhw
  Replies (29) Good night (6334) Bad night (1355)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!

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  (845): I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!! http://tfl.nu/6xbj
  Replies (42) Good night (2632) Bad night (7151)
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  (646): View more from New York

  I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.

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  (646): I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot. http://tfl.nu/r2lr
  Replies (17) Good night (6534) Bad night (1138)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was

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  (919): I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was http://tfl.nu/prge
  Replies (6) Good night (3207) Bad night (1139)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.

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  (207): My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad. http://tfl.nu/6faf
  Replies (8) Good night (4660) Bad night (1245)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.

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  (703): I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia. http://tfl.nu/9rne
  Replies (8) Good night (1973) Bad night (1209)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.

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  (267): i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man. http://tfl.nu/8n1a
  Replies (3) Good night (1556) Bad night (748)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home

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  (617): Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home http://tfl.nu/toow
  Replies (2) Good night (524) Bad night (1065)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!

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  (618): I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!! http://tfl.nu/uufd
  Replies (4) Good night (830) Bad night (456)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered

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  (303): Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered http://tfl.nu/0k0t
  Replies (2) Good night (653) Bad night (421)
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.

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  (985): Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods. http://tfl.nu/ey1m
  Replies (5) Good night (1022) Bad night (365)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd

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  (732): look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd http://tfl.nu/r6dg
  Replies (2) Good night (377) Bad night (236)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.

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  (636): Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night. http://tfl.nu/w1c7
  Replies (1) Good night (895) Bad night (194)

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