he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
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I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
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You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.