This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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