Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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