did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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