were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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