it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
