STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize