I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize