is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
