how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
