just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
