In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
