I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Randomize
