Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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