hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Randomize