So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
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