Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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