So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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