I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
